Tag Archives: Allah


Remember during Ramadan you can still stay on this WOE.

Don’t use Ramadan as an excuse to wave off the low carb path.

Wishing everyone a Ramadan Mubara(Blessed Ramadan) and Kul’am wa enta bi-khair(May every year find you in good health)!










This past week one of my good friends passed away at an early age, he left behind a beautiful wife and 4 daughters. Yes, when I say an early age I do mean he was my age.  The cause of death was heart attack with clogged artieries.  Drs had prewarned him months prior to have tests done and even when he waas experiencing chest pains just days before his passing, he did not go seek medical attention.

At the end of the week I had heard that another one of my friends, even younger yet as he just turned 21, was arrested for a Felony and drug possession.  He is looking at a minimum of 5 years behind prsion bars, leaving behind a beautiul 3 years old.  He had doctor warnings and previous close calls.  His addiction caused him to obtain Hepatitis C.

Another example, my ex, his life is slipping away as h is spiraling into his herion addiction and when doing so he is worsening his Hepatitis C.  He is 6’4″ and his weight is 120.  It breaks my heart to see his weight increasingly get smaller.  He has had numerous warnings from doctors, addictions specialists, counselors, therapists, cops, judges, friends, family, etc.

These people have seen their family and friends die before them from not listening to their doctors or following advice from others.

Why are people ignoring warnings when it comes to their health?
Do people think that they are part cats and actually have 9 lives?

When my mom passed in 2010, she did so after not listening to the advice of her doctor.  She was diabetic but could not stay away from the unhealthy eating.  That unhealthy eating caused her diabetic body to go into renal failure.

The year my mom died is when I started my healthy way of eating, my new lifestyle of low carb.  I did not want my life to be a shadow of hers.  I wanted what I saw motivate me to not be the same.

For six years I have been enjoying Low Carb.  I have had setbacks, mainly my disability which effected my mobility so exercise is very limited, however, I still continue.  If it wasn’t for my vigilance to stay on track with low carb, I would be much heavier and unhealthier today.  I may still be pudgy, but at least I am healthy.

As of today I have no diabetes, no high blood pressure, no tumors, no masses, no hypertension, no blood clots, no heart problems, no gout, no sleep apnea, no high cholesterol, etc..

I did have a non functioning gall bladder that was removed, but that was from the rapid weight loss rather than obesity.

At this moment I am just dumbfouned.

I am trying to understand why people who have people that love them are not trying to be their best?  You have children depending on you to be there for them in their lives as a parent, a friend, a mentor.  Why are they throwing their lives away and not listening to the medical professionals and people who have been in that position before?  Why are they not learning from the examples others have gone through?

I am still boggled and all I can think to do is pray.

Pray for these souls to change before its too late and they can not.  Pray that they see life as only being lived once and to not take it for granted,  believing that they are themselves invincible.

No one person is invincible, Only ALLAH is invincible.



Yes I have been absent for about 2 weeks, wait what is the date??  OK closer to 3 weeks.

The hardest thing to do right now is to get back to blogging.  Not because I don’t want to, because I do, it’s in my heart to blog.

Let’s start with why I took a mini vacation, it had nothing to do with my writing.

Ok here it goes…I am no longer engaged.  It turns out my fiance` would rather have a relationship with Herion than he would with me.

In hind site it should have ended sooner, but there was a difference in opinion, I saw the user signs but his family didn’t and continued to enable him, by letting him stay with them, giving him money, not pushing him to pay the consequences as he has 2 warrants out for his arrest.  It ended when his family called me, telling me they found needles and he has bruises all on his arms.  But yet still they say there is nothing they can do.  But when I offered help they denied that he needed it.  My heart breaks but it is what it is.

His mom asked me for money, I told her I have no money..she says you don’t have $50, I said no, She said how about $30.  I explained I have no money, she replied, You don’t even have $10.  See this is the thing, that way of her asking me for money, her son used to do to me when he needed dope.  Even if I had money, why would i give it to her as it would only go to continuing the enabling of her son.

It was at that moment I knew I had to back away.  That whole home is just a ticking time bomb, where the addiction behavior is being accepted as a norm and is reinorced by her enabling and the mom is probably also using.  Truth is that home has 3 known users residing in it and his mom is in recovery, however her actions make me question if she has relapsed.

I had to end the relationship with the family, I told her before I hung up, you are enabling your children to death.  She has 2 adult children with Herion and Xanax issues, her husbdand is a pill popper and well she has a history of opiate abuse through pills as well. Which the way she asked for money is not my only suspicion that she is using.  She called me and within 1 minute of talking on the phone, she was snoring…Yes her i am talking and I hear heavy breathing then a loud ZZZZZZZZ.  Another time she called and was switching subjects, I could not keep her focused.  She would be screaming in my ear, then getting food, then she was talking to a squirrel outside, then she was  slurring and I have no idea what the heck she was saying….my head was dizzy trying to keep up with atll the curves.

So again, why did I take a mini vacation?  I was in love with my hunny, he meant the world to me..I would have done anything for him, I would die for him.  He would have done the same thing, unfortunatley it wouln’t be for me but for the drugs.

Its hard to be in relationship and you find out your partner cheats with another, however its harder when the cheating is not even a person but an inanimate object.  All the love and affection that should have be given to me he was giving to a drug that only provides a moment of  pleasure.

Like to see that a drug was getting more attention than you, it causes one to sit and wonder, what is wrong with me…Why is he more into a drug then me, why does he not love me more than that fucking drug(pardon my French).  He calls his dealer more than me, he would go to the end of the earth to get to his drug..

It’s just it takes a hit on a persons’ self esteeem to just think, “He would rather be with his syringe than with me…that Herion makes him happier than I do.”

And I am an emotional eater so going through all of this was quite the challenege.  I tried my hardest not to submit my control over to my own drug of sweets and junk food.  I not only lost my love, I lost a family, I lost a part of myself.

So I kinda just took off the time to spend time with myself and get past the hurt.  I didn’t want to go through this moment of time by being fake, acting ok when in reality I was broken. You guys deserved better than that, hell I deserve better than that.

Insha ‘Allah , God will work his miracles in this situation and my hunny will escape the darkness get help in the light before its too late.









Well ok I specifically notice two things, so far.

#1. This is the only time that your non fasting friends offer to take you out to eat and pick up your bill.

This can not only be happening to me, everytime I am fasting that is when I get the most offers to go out and get some lunch, breakfast, coffee, etc and they will pick up the bill.  What makes it even more so this year is that my birthday happens during Ramadan.  Some People get offended if you go out with them when they are treating and you ask for your meal to be all put in a container for later, after Ifta. and you just sit there watching your friend eat and drink.

#2. The Ramadan Police.  Oh my…ok my fasting is between me and Allah.  I do not need someone to point out what I already know and make me feel inferior to them on the Muslim plane.  There are times where fasting can not be done, it does not make me less of a Muslim. Truthfully, when I can not fast I already feel crummy, like I not only let myself down, but Allah..so I do not need someone else jumping on my bandwagon.  FYI, I do lift myself up as I know I am only sick and unable to do things as Allah wills it, there is a reason for everything and Like i said my life, my choices, my decisions are between me and God, Allah is the only one who can Judge me.  So thank you Ramadan Police but you are so not needed.

Plus I hate trying to defend my actions.  If approached by a Ramadan Po-Po (slang for police out here), they just don’t stop…

“How come you are not fasting?”

“I am sick.”

“You are SICK!!  How are you sick?”

“I am sick.”

“Tell me how you are sick.  Are you contagious?”


“You have a disease?”


“What do you have that makes you so sick that you can not fast for Allah, after everything he has done and provided for you?”

You stand there looking around and now all these people are just staring at you due to the Ramadan Police making a scene.  Sweat is pouring, your hijab is soaked (Your cell phone short circuited if you use the hijab as a cell phone holster).  You stare down at your feet.  You feel the stares weigh on you like stones, weighing heavier with each second of them waiting for your answer.

“Well, what is your sickness?”

Finally you blurt out, “I am on my period.” You watch as all the judgmental stares turn into facial expressions of disgust.

“Oh we didn’t need to know that, why didn’t you just say you were sick?”

SMH.(well how are they suppose to know, you weren’t wearing nail polish)


“God’s pleasure is in the pleasure of the father,

and God’s displeasure is in the displeasure of the father.”

Fathers are significant because they are commanded by Allah (swt) to work hard to provide the physical, educational, psychological, and spiritual needs of a child.  ‘Ali ibn al-Husain (r) is reported to have said,

The right of your father on you is that you should know that

it is he who brought you into existence, and you are a branch of the tree of his life.”

Fathers have a powerful influence on the healthy development of their daughters and sons.

  • School-aged children show significant gains in intellectual development when their fathers are involved with them as infants.
  • Involved fathers enrich their daughter’s and son’s self image.
  • Children who have involved fathers show more sense of humor, longer attention spans, and more eagerness for learning.
  • Father involvement helps teens to develop a strong sense of who they are and increases their ability to resist peer pressure.

Dads are role models who teach their children to be strong, flexible adults.

  • Fathers teach gender roles: they are generally more physically active with their sons and more protective of their daughters.
  • Fathers often think “out of the box” and offer alternative strategies for problem solving.
  • Dads tend to offer more physical play than mothers, which increases the physical competency of their young children.
  • When fathers model behaviors that are respectful to women, their sons are more likely to model their father’s respectful behavior as well.

Islam encourages the need to show continuous kindness, respect, care, and concern towards fathers as it can often be difficult to keep a steady balance between working, taking care of a household, and fulfilling the many roles of a parent.

Abu Hurairah always encouraged other people to be kind and good to their parents.

One day he saw two men walking together and enquired of the younger one, “Who is this man to you?” to which the young man replied, “He is my father.”  Abu Hurairah advised him by saying, “Do not call him by his name, do not walk in front of him, and do not seat yourself before he does.”



Well I slept well past Suhoor, well past it like hours past.

So I get up and just brush my teeth.

I sit trying to keep myself occupied.  Can’t watch TV, oh all those food commercials.  *Drool*

Cant read magazines or newspapers as I see all the restaurant ads.  *Drool*

My friend call, “Hey girl how you doing, what did you eat today?”

“Nothing, I slept through Suhoor.”

Shaking off what I said, she replies, “You wanna go out and get a bite to eat?”

“I can’t, its’s Ramadan, I am fasting.  I cannot eat until Iftar.”

“Oh, when is that?”


“PM? Isn’t that kind late to be eating dinner? Come on come out and have some food with me. What will it hurt?”

At this point I am just shaking my head.

“You can make up the day, like I do with Lent if I make an oopsie.”(LOL, yep she said oopsie.)

“No I am fasting, I can not and will not.”

“So is that a no, to going out for food?”

“Can you wait till 8:30 PM?”

“Are you crazy, I can’t wait that long to eat, I will be withered away by then.”

“Yes, then that is a NO from me.”

Why is it so hard for non-Muslims to understand Ramadan.  It is not voluntary, it is a mandatory for all Muslims.

Its not like Lent, where you give up only one item for thirty days.

If a day is to be made up it is because I was ill, not because I wanted to break fast to eat with a friend.

Allah sees my actions and knows what is in my heart.  I will face him on judgement day and if I break fast for a selfish reason, I will pay for it threefold.