So here I sit, ready to type but not sure what to say.

First off, I am still fighting the sinus infection that I was prescribed antibiotics and prednisone for last week, however it has now travels further into my chest.  I woke up bright and early, well 8am as that is when the doctor’s office opened and called them.  I understand its the day after a holiday and they are probably busy.  I told them the problem, the antibiotics is not working and the congestion is in my chest.  I am asthmatic.  Now I am not sure how many other asthmatics are out there reading this, but when I have an asthma attack or chest congestion that can cause asthma attacks, I also get Panic attacks, nothing scares me more than having a difficult time breathing.  So for me asthma attacks and chest congestion go hand in hand with panic attacks.  Its the nature of my beast.

SO I call and I am told that my primary doctor is off for a few days, he had a sudden death in the family.  Tha’s sad but the nurse stated that she would ask the other doctor and get back to me.  I said ok, I said maybe you can just call in a new script and throat medication as my throw is so raw it hurts to swallow to say time of coming back in as I was just in last week.

I went to my scheduled neurology appointment as I was getting the finals of all my tests.  how did that go?  My appointment was at 10:30am, I arrived at 10:15 am and left at 2pm.

You know you fight for so long, in my case I was off work on disability 6/22/2012 and since then I have been fighting trying to find out what exactly is wrong.  Well now it 5/26/2015(we’ll yesterday was, but you get the jist).  I had so many doctors telling me, nope nothing is wrong with you,  tests after tests they would all just keep saying you just need to seek mental health services, that will cure your problems.  Well yesterday my full work of my Mobility disability in no particular order cause no one is worse than another; Degenerative Disk disorder, Tinnitus, Vertigo, disc herniations throughout the lower and upper back, scoliosis, I had a upper back fracture that had appeared to heal over, deep white matter in my brain that will be re-examined in 6 months. Neuropathy, Thoracic and Lumbar stenosis.  One of the disk is pinching on my spinal nerve and that is why the doctor is now referring me to a surgeon, it is compressed so bad that it is running out of space and surgery in her eyes is the last resort but sees that I have been in pain so long with this battle that it is now time for intervention Surgically.  I still have an appointment for Pain management with them, but all i can do is continue forward. She stated that physical therapy will be a constant in my life and can not guarantee me to return to a working job. The walker I was hoping to part with in the near future, I may need forever.

So I am overcome with emotions, I finally know what is happening, but am upset that no other doctor could see this, they ran tests after tests and they were quick to say nope, its all mental.  Its like you wait and pray for the day, but when it finally comes and you here that the prognosis may not be reversed as you had hoped, you kinda slump down.  I know that right now my Mobility issue is making it harder to lose weight, but I am afraid surgery will almost guarantee me to pack it back on.  Like right now I am lucky enough that I can move a tiny bit, you know enough not to gain, but not enough to lose.  Its a real fear for me.  But my team of doctors are doing their best to support me through this process and they understand my concerns.  But I will NOT, WILL NOT give up my way of eating.  As I know that will be certainly make my nightmares a reality.

Thank Allah for giving me the strength to keep fighting, I knew those other doctors were wrong.  I CAN NOT STRESS ENOUGH, WE LIVE IN OUR BODIES, WE KNOW THEM THE BEST.  IF YOU FEEL LIKE SOMETHING IS WRONG YOU PURSUE AND HUNT AND PURSUE MORE UNTIL YOU GET THE ANSWERS THAT MAKE SENSE TO YOU.  I knew my Mobility disability was not caused by mental illness.  I knew something was terribly wrong.  The only thing is I have been blessed but yet cursed by my dad’s hereditary genes.  I have a high pain tolerance.  So when I finally feel pain, I already know it is advanced Quite bad.  For example, I did a March of Dimes 5-mile charity walk…I was having a minor foot pain.  Well, I did the walk and went to see the ydoctor I said I have a tiny foot discomfort and its now on fire.  The doctor did :-rays came back and says, “You onmy feel a small discomfort?”  I replied, “yeah like a pin poking, but now burning and its is swollen”  the doctor showed me the trays, “See this your foot bone, it is broken in half.”  shaking his head he could not believe that all I felt was a little discomfort.

So I come back from neurologists, I bought 3 watermelons…Yes 3.  Well my dad likes watermelon too, they were sale and it is the one thing right now that helps my throat.  yo as you can see in my picture, yesterday I did chop up a watermelon already.

So the doctor’s office never called me back about my infection, so I am beyond miserable with my throat and upset.  I love my doctor, but he is unavailable.  You can have the best doctor, but yet their associates and staff as not as good.  I will call them after lunchtime.  So her I am trying to figure out what I can and can’t eat.  I know for a fact NO DAIRY!!! I have an infection, consuming dairy will only produce excess mucus and that am what I am trying to get rid of, so why produce more.  So now no coffee, as I use heavy whipping cream, no butter, no milk, no cream, no yogurt which means no cereal(I use yogurt to make my cereal).  I made ranch dressing 2 days ago for my weekly salads and now I can not enjoy it as it has dairy, so no green salads.  I have to puree my meats to make them soft enough to swallow. I hard boiled an egg so I will make a whipped egg salad later.  I should drink broth, but the sodium intake raises my blood pressure too much. And the worse of the worse, no protein shakes…cuz it contains dairy….ARGH!!!!

I am continuing on my low carb way of eating, but have slightly lifted up my carb intake due to the fact that my carbs are mostly watermelon, but I needed to adjust as I need it for my throat. But this is just temporary.

I AM NOT GIVING UP!!!  Just cuz I have been going thorough a hard time, I will not let the situation control me, I am continuing to control the situation.  I may have to make temporary adjustments, but it is only temporary and not to be seen as a set back.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s